FACT:  The Con is like a Star Trek convention and Halloween all rolled into one.  
It attracts a certain high-ish percentage of borderline out-of-touch thespians
(often in costume) that I don’t want to see.  Like the 300 lb. Spidey or the
horrible images - like pictures of Auschwitz I wish I hadn’t seen.  So do I want to
become one of them?

POSSIBLE IDEA: Blondie is older than I am (How does she do it?).  All I’d need is
a Wonderbra and some Kleenex (same as my old Daisy Mae outfit, but not torn).  
Okay who am I kidding?  I’ve got to get real.  I’ve got to pick a character with my
similar body type.  

LIGHT BULB!  Mutt and Jeff!  (I LOVE the classics!)  I own both a vest and a high
silk hat. All I’d have to do is let my moustache grow out.  I’d like to be Mutt (the
taller of the two), but because I’m 4’11,” I’d have to find someone shorter than
me to be Jeff and that might limit the casting possibilities.  So I’ll be Jeff.  And all
I need is a partner 5’ 4” or taller.  So, hello all you Mutts out there.  I can’t do it
without you.  Please send me an Email stating WHY you want to play the part of
Mutt to my Jeff along with a JPEG of you in your costume.  The winning Email
gets the job.